Traveling Mango

New Blog

2011-12-24T21:20:00.000-08:00

Hello :)

I have packed up and moved to

www.travelingmango.com

please follow me there, and leave me a comment so I can read your blog!

Abundance

2011-09-20T12:27:00.000-07:00

Whatever you think the world is witholding from you, you are withholding from the world. You are withholding it because deep down you think you are small and that you have nothing to give.

Try this: whatever you think people are withholding from you- praise, appreciation, assistance, loving care, and so on - give it to them. You don't have it? Just act as if you had it, and it will come. Soon after you start giving, you will start receiving.

You cannot receive what you don't give. OUTFLOW DETERMINES INFLOW.

Whatever you think the world is witholding from you, you already have, but unless you allow it to flow out, you won't even know you have it.

When you smile at a stranger, there is already a minute outflow of energy.

Wine Not?

2011-07-21T15:27:00.000-07:00

It wasn't long ago that I spent my days walking down cobble stone roads exploring the ruins of Rome, feasting on handmade pasta, prosciutto wrapped melon, and drinking family made Italian wine. Not long after that, I spent time in the South of France (hard life, I know) in a small village. Every day I went on long walks through vinyards, took day trips on the train and drank wine, a lot of it. My favorite memories were during sunset, which didn't happen until maybe 9PM, sitting outside drinking wine as the sun went down, smelling the fresh air...you couldn't help but smile.

I always tell people that traveling is a state of mind. When you can't be exploring somewhere new, you gotta travel right where you are. This week I got to do just that. My brother and I attended The Generous Pour Event at The Capital Grille, met some interesting people, from techies to mommie bloggers - all of us with one thing in common... our love of food and wine. For only $25 during dinner, you get unlimited pours of 9 different wines, going on now until September 4th.

The sun set on this hot summer evening, in the terrace as we enjoyed a large selection of wines. Cheese, cheese, cheese, crackers, berries, fig spread, prosciutto, more cheese, and more wine than I could remember. The Capital Grille's master sommelier hung out to answer questions about the origins of the wines. As I made my way around the different food stations the two food items that stole my heart, or I guess my stomach, were the lamb lollipops, and the tenderloin. Both so delicious, the meat melted as you bit into it. Their staff happily told you which wine to pair up with the food item you got, so I had no choice but to follow instructions...hehe.

The evening ended with some chocolate and my favorite wine of all, dessert wine... a port wine from Australia, a country I haven't been to yet. It got me thinking, it's time for me to plan my next trip...

Travel On.

(Event photos taken by Albert Evangelista)

2011-07-20T00:12:00.000-07:00

After a break-up most girls buy clothes, I buy plane tickets. My favorite shopping is grocery shopping and I prefer a park over the mall.

Summer Lovin'

2011-06-27T16:35:00.000-07:00

Off to Emerald City

2011-06-16T09:02:00.000-07:00

Time to fall inlove with a new city. Seattle. In doing some research I found it nicknamed "rain city" for the obvious reason, and "emerald city" for its lush evergreen forest. I am already daydreaming of how it will feel to be there. Walking around wearing a peacoat and scarf, getting coffee at a quaint coffee shop where not one coffee mug is the same. I already see myself and the group of girls who will be celebrating my friends bachelorette party with, drinking at a wine bar, laughing as I get a glimpse of the rain falling outside. I can't wait to try new food, see new faces, and enjoy the cold rainy weather...maybe run into some vampires...

Travel on.

# 22 Go to Medieval Times

2011-06-13T20:51:00.000-07:00

From my 101 things to do in 1001 days... For one of my roommate's birthday we decided to go to Medieval Times. Besides my allergic reaction to the Knights...or possibly horses, we had a blast! You get sat on a first come first serve basis, our seats were way in the back, but still had a great view. We were in the black and white team, who had the hottest Knight yet the first to die in battle like a wimp (hint hint - if you want your knight to win get there early). We ate with no utensils, chicken that was almost all good, minus the dry parts, one rib bathed in bbq sauce, a potato with some sort of seasoned goodness, and the best apple tart I've ever eaten with my hand. Happy to cross this one of the list finally!

Catalina Love

2011-06-10T15:13:00.000-07:00

Went on a little trip this past weekend to Catalina Island

looking back at Long Beach from Catalina Express

our pretty pretty pink hotel and golf cart

the yummiest made fresh waffle cones and ice cream ever.

hanging out by the water. happy. happy happy.

Corn Island, Nicagarua

2011-05-24T20:41:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time I met a group of travelers at a tiny airport in Nicaragua, while I was trying to get to the Corn Islands. Ben from Australia, Shanaz & Nick – a couple from England, and Yohanna from Finland. We hopped on planes as small as the ones you use to go skydiving and flew across the ocean to land (than God) into the Big Corn island. This island wasn’t really impressive, but we couldn’t get a boat to little corn island until the next day so we made the best of it.

The humidity was so bad at this point on the trip, that we were ecstatic when it started raining, and even happier to find a cheap hotel with air conditioning. There wasn’t much to do at this island, besides eat pretty bad food. We ended up meeting a drug dealer however; how we came to the conclusion that he was a drug dealer, I don’t quite remember, but he made our stay pretty memorable.

He approached our table at a restaurant to invite us to a big cookout at the beach. He wanted us each to pitch in 100 cordobas for supplies, and although he seemed super shady, we all still pitched in and agreed to meet him at the beach at sunset. I’m laughing at myself as I write this, because it seems like a set up, but at least we had safety in numbers.

We showed up, and D (we learned was his name) was there starting to set up, he invited other visitors (aka sucker tourists like us). We all sat around a big fire, drinking beer and chatting until the food was ready. He basically threw in a bunch of food in a huge pot filled with coconut milk, fish, yucca, and plantain. The entertainment of trying to servethe little bits of food that were actually in there, while avoiding the wind while witnessing an altercation with a local who claimed we burned down part of her tree on, was pretty comical. She came at him all “oh no you didn’t style.” To finish off our meal D rolled up a joint on a banana leaf…how tropical…

The next morning after our mildly entertaining adventure we took a ferry to Little corn Island, a place with not a single car, or roads large enough to ever fit one. After being dropped off at the docks, we walked through sand, and jungles asking around at different hotels for vacancy. We finally found a place that had huts available. Forget ocean view, we ended up getting a hut literally ON the ocean. I mean like ON the beach. Like there was no floor in this bungalow thing. There were hammocks everywhere, one right outside of our door. Then other little bungalows with tables to eat and play cards… then more hammocks everywhere, and two steps out – the beach.

Pineapple juice, banana bread, oatmeal, fresh fruit under palapas every morning. I took long naps in those hammocks listening to music, feeling the sun, I had gallo pinto with lizano sauce, fish and plantains, thinking it couldn't get more Caribbean than that.

Bob Marley always reminds me of growing up in Puerto Vallarta, so I day dreamed with his music as I laid around and swam in the ocean. I think in totally we spent 1 or 2 weeks here, but this was one of those times where I realized time being a theory might be true. I swear when I was in this island, time did not exist… hours felt like days, days felt like minutes, naps made me feel new, when I swam out of the water I felt new days, long days, happy days, solitude and company, quiteness, calmness, beauty.

I saw so many sunrises, and sunsets. Went on so many long walks, fought the urge to scratch so many mosquito bites. Went to a baseball game (baseball is Nicaragua's national sport, over futbol!) I stayed up listening to heavy storm make music on our tin roof, I went snorkeling, I prayed, listened to music and life, played bachi ball, and saw more sunrises and sunsets until it was time to watch the sunrise somewhere new...

man backwards

2011-05-08T12:55:00.000-07:00

Hold on to your own demise. Keep your sorrow to yourself. The joy you find in your new found freedom from "trouble" was there all along. You were never faithful, you were never loyal, you just worked hard at hiding the truth. You can't grow if you don't change, and you cannot change if you never try. You can't heal when you have never experienced pain, because you are too afraid of love. Your insecurities were the deepest cuts. I walked out of this in shame, defeated, left alone to scream and cry in my anguish. You were quick to consider me family, until things were bad. Until I needed you, then you left without a trace.

Family could never do that. I've wiped off my knees, and cleaned up my bruises. I sleep through the night knowing I did my best. I gave everything I could, when there was nothing on the other side. Although it hurt, and it stung, the distance has given me perspective. I don't make empty promises the way that you do. I could never promise rainbows and butterflies, all I could promise was that I would try. You made me feel guilty for not throwing down absolute submission to your mistreatment. I thought that I failed again and again. Yet you stood there on your pedestal, lie after lie, deception upon deception, trying to fool me with the curve balls. I was the trophy hanging on to your right arm, you were the envy of all of your friends. You acted confident, until it was just the two of us. Then in our solitude and silence, you were afraid of too much, afraid of too close, afraid of never being good enough for me. For once you were right, you could never be good enough - not even enough.

Yet, I fell every time. How could I put you through yet another storm? Your deception is clear now. You shifted blame around until you confused me enough to believe you. My claims were true, and if I had to I would cause storm and hurricanes again and again because my soul screamed at me to. To try to find a single answer, a single apology, a single true sentiment. You manipulated me into believing the pain I felt by your disrespect was unwarranted. You took me for granted, named my sensitivity as a weakness, and you walked out of this with your hands clean. You never wanted me, you just didn't want anyone else to have me.

I hold no regards for you, not an ounce of respect. A persons true character is shown in difficult times, and you absolutely failed. The most cowardly person I have ever met. The weakest, the most insecure and the most afraid of living. I can never hate you, but I equally cannot love you. You are less than a stranger to me. Your recent half assed attempt to weasel yourself into my life again is just another slap in the face. A forced apology request? Feeling a bit of guilt? Who knows? Most importantly, who really cares? I have no sentiment for you. Any memory of you dissolves into nothingness more and more each day.

I am thankful for the pain that I felt, because I know I opened myself up for it. I have no regrets, and I'll open myself up again and again. I'll keep learning, I'll keep loving, I'll keep growing, you on the other hand stopped years before I ever met you.

Out of sadness, I found strength, and from my strength has come happiness. I find myself exactly where I am meant to be, and it is without you. For that I can only thank you. My only thought is that you will never find the same transformation because you will always sit in the bleachers, helmet on, playing it safe, while me and the rest of the world are out there living life, no matter how many times we fail.

Foto Friday

2011-05-06T08:04:00.000-07:00

My roommate #2 and I
Roommate Love

This is one of my favorite pictures of my roommate and I. I was lucky enough to meet this mofo through a very close friend, and we clicked instantly. He's one of those people as soon as we started talking I knew I was meant to meet. We both nerd out on similar interests, and relentlessly try to one up each other with anything from theories to jokes.

I picked this picture specifically because I feel just as excited for my own travels as I am to those who are close to me. This crazy mofo is going on his first trip outside of the west coast next week... to New York city. I feel like it's me going.

I still remember my first time in New York, it changed my life. Can't wait for it to change his.

Travel on, you creep!

My 3 New favorite travelers to follow....

2011-04-15T13:36:00.000-07:00

Until my next travel... may our free spirits meet somewhere along YOUR journey!

#1. Borderless State of Mind I met this wonderful person in San Francisco, her then-boyfriend was my then-boyfriend's roommate. I convinced her to work for Jager with me and we rocked orange wigs through our adventures in one of the best cities in the world. She fascinates me beyond words. She just did grad school abroad (putting my travels to shame) ... and is now back-packing in South America. My words can't do her justice. Just read her shit.

#2. The Many Faces of You I met this girl at a nightclub in Orange County. She was our server. I was immediately drawn to her, not only because of her beauty, but her energy. She was dancing around with a big smile on her face every single minute that she worked. I added her on facebook, and weeks later realized she had taken off to travel all over the world. I drool over her blog. You should too.

#3. Fluent in Frolicking Another San Francisco-er. We probably have only spent a matter of hours together...she was introduced to me through friends at the always-amazing-bay-to-breakers-race. We were in the same Circus themed group. It doesn't get cooler than "I just bought a one way ticket to Vietnam, don't know how long I'll stay or where I will go next."

travel on my friends.

day 30 Picture of Someone You Miss

2011-04-15T12:00:00.000-07:00

My grandfather

It's cliche but he was the best man I have ever known. I spent my childhood laughing next to him. I can thank him for my humor, curly hair, and all the love I ever needed.

day 29 Picture That Can Always Make You Smile

2011-04-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

Costa Rica.

day 28 Picture of Something You're Afraid of

2011-04-06T10:25:00.000-07:00

Drowning

day 27

2011-04-05T10:24:00.000-07:00

Picture of Yourself and a Family Member

Me with my cousins Andrea and Luciano at Disneyland. A few months after I moved to San Francisco my cousins moved to Orange County from Mexico. I flew down to see them and with the people I still knew at Disneyland got to get us all in to Disneyland. It was their first time :) They're back to living in Mexico, I wish they still lived in California!

day 26 Picture of Something That Means a Lot to You

2011-04-04T10:24:00.000-07:00

Pictures people in my life and our adventures!

day 24

2011-04-02T10:22:00.000-07:00

Picture of something you wish you could change

I am stumped. Anything that comes to mind that I want to change I am actively working on changing (wish makes it sound as though it is not possible) and believe will change. I can't change anything in the past, so there is no point in wishing that...

so I hereby declare day 24 as a blank.

day 23 Picture of Your Favorite Book

2011-04-01T10:22:00.000-07:00

day 22

2011-03-31T10:22:00.000-07:00

Picture of something you wish you were better at

meditation. conscious breathing. being present.

weight lifting.

html coding.

day 21

2011-03-30T10:21:00.000-07:00

Picture of something you wish you could forget

my step father

I searched "step dad" under google images and this picture came up. Perfect.

Day 20 Picture of Somewhere You'd Love to Travel

2011-03-29T12:00:00.000-07:00

machu picchu peru

let's go!

Day 19 Picture and a Letter

2011-03-28T00:12:00.000-07:00

towards an adventure

So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. -Chris McCandless (1968- 1992)

If you haven't read Into the Wild, read it, or at least watch the movie. The book is a compilation of letters, and journals Chris McCandless wrote to friends, or for himself when he went out "into the wild." The quote above resonated with me deeply when I read it. I highlighted ,underlined, and folded the page so I could read it whenver I remembered. I believe in those words so strongly, he said it absolutely perfectly.

Day 18

2011-03-27T20:30:00.000-07:00

Picture of your biggest insecurity

Day 17

2011-03-26T11:11:00.000-07:00

Picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

This book is good stuff. I've been wanting to read his stuff for a while, then the opportunity presented itself when someone at work brought this in. I am constantly working on being more present in my life, and this book has an incredible way of breaking that down. Of explaining the ego, and showing how to control it. I highly recomend reading it to anyone who wants to deeply know themselves.

Day 16 Picture of Someone Who Inspires You

2011-03-25T14:10:00.000-07:00

A picture of someone who inspires you

my bff Brooke

badass

ok. really?

perfect form

So Brooke and I know each other from high school cross country and track. She has ALWAYS inspired me. One of the most dedicated people I know. She's a phenomenal athlete with a mind that doesn't take defeat. This is just a small side of who she is however. She inspires me in pretty much every aspect of my life. She writes eloquently, she is well read, she's very accepting, she's hiiiiilarious, she can cook like no body's business, she loves dorky things like vampire books (me too!) she's close to her family...on and on and on.

I am still surprised someone like Brooke exists, and feel blessed to be her friend.

The way she has inspired me the most recently is by her crazy fitness (as pictured above) since joining cross fit, she's gotten even more buff, become a coach and even started blogging for her gym. I hope I can find a job I love as much as she does!

last year on her bday I wrote an obsessive entry about her.

and this is her blog. read it.

the end

Please Me Like You Want To

2011-03-25T09:20:00.000-07:00

Don't do me any favors, matter of fact why don't you do yourself a few?

Your presence ain't nobody's blessing

I've got plenty of other things I could do

Currently loving this song

Loving Ben Harper always

Day 15

2011-03-24T09:09:00.000-07:00

Picture of something you want to do before you die

write a book. publish it.

bungy jump. already sky-dove twice. on to the next one.

have a baby with someone I love.

go to all 7 continents. 4 to go.

hike half dome. all of it. been to Yosemite twice & didn't have a chance to.

EEEEEK!!!

2011-03-23T12:30:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the hiatus on the 30 day challenge. I usually roll my eyes at people that tweet "I'll be right back" (no one cares). But in the case that you've been following my pictures... I was in Mexico for the past 5 days with no internet!

Back to our regularly scheduled programing...

crickets...crickets...

Day 14

2011-03-17T11:08:00.000-07:00

Picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

my family.

my friends.

Day 13

2011-03-15T11:07:00.000-07:00

Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist

Bright Eyes

As my friend Joe B. always said "picking a favorite band is like picking a favorite child." But alas if I must, Bright Eyes would be it. Probably the artist (besides Mexican singers that I have loved since I was little and will love until I die) that I have liked the longest, while my thoughts, beliefs and dreams have been ever changing. Conor Oberst's lyrics have stayed near and dear to my heart. The fear I have of reading books I loved when I was in high school, and no longer loving them now in my adult years is not a fear I have with his music. His voice draws me in every.single.time.

Day 12 Picture of Something You Love

2011-03-15T10:54:00.000-07:00

Day 12 - A picture of something you love
uni

My mouth is watering just looking at this picture! If you've had uni you either hate it or love it. I was confused the first time I tried it, so I gave it 3 more tries, and now I crave it on the regular. Sea urchin served as seen above, or in a roll with fish eggs. I saw a sushi chef make it with quail egg once... I'll have to try that next.

I love you uni. Thank you for feeding me.

Day 11 Picture of Something You Hate

2011-03-14T11:03:00.000-07:00

Day 11 - Picture of Someting You Hate

Not Getting Enough Sleep

I can do 3 or 4 hours of sleep one night, and try really hard not to be completely out of it, but don't push it. Usually I can't function without sleep, and I am super grumpy.

Day 10

2011-03-13T12:00:00.000-07:00

Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with

Vanessa & I causing trouble in San Francisco

Vanessa (always), Kiyomi and I...aka Vanursmi, aka the Trinity. Buzzed with Buzz.

Day 9

2011-03-12T00:05:00.000-08:00

Day 9 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most

My Mom

Without a doubt- my mom. Through the worse of times and through the best of times. The biggest fan of my life. The most beautiful woman I know. No matter what we do together, we are usually laughing. When you meet her, you will love her too!

Day 8 Picture That Makes Me Laugh

2011-03-11T00:04:00.000-08:00

Day 8 - Picture That Makes Me Laugh

My First Communion

I don't know what it is about certain latino and asian cultures with not smiling, but this is a perfect example of it. Besides that, this picture is ridiculously hilarious to me for many reasons, such as but not limited to: everyone looks so miserable, my brother looks black, I look like I'm about to get married at 10 years old in a wedding dress made for a 21 year old (don't be jealous of my hair cut, or my lace gloves!), my grandmother looks like she is dying to leave, and my grandpa seems to be blinded by a flash.

laugh on :)

Day 7 Picture of My Most Treasured Item

2011-03-05T00:03:00.002-08:00

Day 7 Picture of My Most Treasured Item

Mixed tapes and cd's.

This is one of the best gifts I can get. I love music, and music from people I love is even better. A current favorite is a CD my roommate made and labeled "YOUR LOSS" That CD got us through some crazy times :)

Pictures.

Colorful reminders of the places I've been and the people I've met. Sometimes proof that the craziest-luckiest-most-incrediblethings-happen to me-just-because, and if i didn't document it (example above - I'm in the purple) no one would ever believe me.

Books.

Reading is forever changing me. My favorite books are usually given to me as gifts. I like to pass them on after I read them. I like reading in awesome places such as the place pictured above (Blue Lakes in Lake Tahoe) or the Eiffel Tower in France. Sometimes in my living room too.

Letters. Cards. Notes. Journals.

I have boxes filled with letters and all kinds of cards, as far back as the second grade. You sitting in silent focusing on a piece of paper to tell me lots of wonderful things is the ultimate form of flattery to me. My grandfather used to send me telegrams. I love those too. I've kept a journal since the 4th grade, one day I'll give someone my box of journals.

Day 6

2011-03-05T00:03:00.001-08:00

Day 06 - Picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day

Carrie Underwood

Farmers daughter turned country music super star. The video below shows her performance that changed everything in American Idol. I get chills listening to her powerful voice. Simon says to her "not only will you win this show, you will sell more records than any other previous idol."

Simon's prediction was right, yet she has stayed so humble. I've seen her in concert and she's got the entire audience wrapped around her finger.

I'd like to be her for a day and feel the power and energy she must feel when she's performing.

Day 5 A Picture of Your Favorite Memory

2011-03-05T00:02:00.002-08:00

Day 5 - A picture of Your Favorite Memory

too many to pick just one

Skydiving with my best friend

Bay 2 Breakers 2008 White Trash Theme

Memorial Day Weekend 2010 in Las Vegas. No Words.

Christmas 2010

Cancun. Best friends. Wedding. Paradise.

Paris in the summer with my Mom. It.Doesn't.Get.Better.Than.This.

New York City. Best Halloween of my life. Epic.

My 25th

Day 4 Picture of My Night

2011-03-05T00:02:00.001-08:00

Day 4 - Picture of My Night

I'm in Miami b*tch!

roof top party

Day 3 Picture of the Cast From Your Favorite Show

2011-03-05T00:01:00.001-08:00

Day 3 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show

I love my Dexter

Something about hilarious, smart serial killers in Miami...

I love my dirty south True Blood

sexy

Day 2

2011-03-05T00:00:00.000-08:00

Day 2 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest

This is Ashley. I can't even call her a friend, she is family. We met on the first day of middle school, a year after I moved to the United States. Alphabetical seating arrangments made it so we sat next to each other. We were both in zero period, p.e. an hour before school, so you could get an extra elective, and drama. Later in high school we were in the same show choir group called encore, where we danced on stage with bright blue and silver sequence dresses. We both went to the same community college, and most recently were roommates for a year.

I can't imagine the past 15 years of my life without Ashley. She's been a fan of my life and an honest believer in me . She's celebrated the good times, and has sat with me through the bad ; no questions asked. I consider myself lucky to have an unbreakable bond with such a bright, talented and loving individual. We've gone months without seeing each other, maybe even a few years due to geographical barriers. I know it's cliche, but every single time we've reunited it has been like no time passed at all.

This is one of my favorite picture of us. If you are asking yourself if we're wearing matching jackets, the answer is yes. If you are wondering if we're holding tickets to watch one of the Twilight movies, the answer is also yes.

Day 1 Picture of Yourself With 10 Facts

2011-03-04T11:59:00.000-08:00

Day 1. A Picture of yourself with 10 facts

1. I love the smell of lemon scented cleaning products; my top favorite is lemon scented dishwasher detergent !
2. I consider letters/cards/notes/postcards, journals, pictures and mixed tapes (& cds) my most prized possessions.
3. I was a hurdler in college.
4. I knew the words to every song on ‘Best of Bob Marley’ CD before I learned how to speak English.
5. The beach is one of my top 5 favorite places – ever. It’s so powerful, yet peaceful and it connects me to the rest of the world through its oceans.
6. I spent a life changing summer in the south of France watching sunsets, hearing live music and drinking wine with my Mother and her husband.
7. Hours after my first visit to San Francisco I knew I had to live there at some point in my life.
8. I eat more than anyone I know, including guys. If you don’t believe me, let’s go eat.
9. I recently got matched with a little sister through the big brothers big sister program. I can’t wait to see where it will lead me.
10. I want to go on an adventure with you. Let’s go!

30 Day Picture Challenge

2011-03-03T22:55:00.000-08:00

Found a picture challenge through the lovely Sole Matters and decided this is just what I needed to inspire myself to start blogging again regularly. I'll start day 1 tomorrow!

Here is the list for the challenge:

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with ten facts
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show
Day 04 - A picture of your night
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory
Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate
Day 12 - A picture of something you love
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die
Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you
Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity
Day 19 - A picture and a letter
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget
Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change
Day 25 - A picture of your day
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss

Foto Friday

2011-01-14T22:44:00.000-08:00

This is a picture of my grandparents on their wedding day. It is one of my favorite pictures of all times. Sometimes I stare at it in awe. Their beauty and love together astounds me. I wish I knew my grandparents when they were this age. They made growing up so fun... Te amo ABJ

#2. Get a Camera

2011-01-11T09:10:00.000-08:00

Another cross off the list from my 101 things to do in 1001 days! A super awesome-totally-on-my-list-thanks-for-the-surprise-Christmas present, a brand new beautiful Canon Powershot SD1300 digital ELPG camera with 12.1 mega pixels, a carrying case and a 2G memory card :D looks like picture below (in silver)

A pulmon

2011-01-07T14:55:00.000-08:00

Someone recently asked me when and how I learned Spanish. This usually leads to their realization that Spanish is actually my first language. So, when did I learn English? Telling this story always gets me thinking.

I get chills referencing to this time period, the adrenaline and determination that ran through my body. Since I found out our family would be moving to the states I was fascinated with the idea of life here. Mostly I remember daydreaming about what it would be like to rollerblade or ride my bicycle on a paved sidewalk without holes and rocks everywhere.

More than anything though, I day dreamed about speaking English. I wanted to carry on a conversation the way I could hear in the movies, one sylable after the other like a drawn out melody. My friends and I would walk around pretending we could have these conversations, but all we were saying was "hello, one, two, three, four" over and over, with some made up words here and there.

Although once here, I would have traded the nice roads for cobblestone, black liquorice for Lucas, and being lonely for being with my friends again - my interest in English didn't stop. I practiced day and night. I loved spelling and constantly wanted to have contests with my brother, who was always annoyed with me and just wanted to play normal games. It seemed like no time at all, but in less than 6 months my ELD (English Language Development) teacher asked me to test out of her class and into regular class.

I was so scared, but my heart didn't skip a beat. I took the test, passed with flying colors, and left all my Japanese friends behind to go to "regular school." My teacher told me that most kids stay in ESL/ELD through middleschool and highschool - and that I was a very rare case. I've never told this story to brag, in fact I seldom tell this story.

This last time that I told the story however, not sure what was different, but I was inspired. Not because I think I did something incredible, but because I achieved something I wanted. It's so simple when I look back, yet so fascinating to me what wanting so bad lead me to. It's been a reminder about the passion I've felt for something and how far along it has lead me. I want these feelings of determination and accomplishment now, here, again and again...

Foto Friday

2010-07-30T10:10:00.000-07:00

I've decided to start a Foto Friday. I know a lot of other bloggers have this, which has often discouraged me from starting it. Until I read this quote...on another blog. This is so cool.

At This Time Last Year... Roughing it in Nicaragua

2010-07-27T21:00:00.000-07:00

I left you at Perkin, El Salvador at this time last year... I walked down the 100 plus steps from there to catch the bus in front of our hotel, to Nicaragua.

I only waited 30 minutes before a guy came down to tell me I was waiting on the wrong side of the street. It came an hour later than the women in the kitchen told me it would, but at least it came - since the man at the front desk told me there are no real roads to Marcala, where I was trying to get to.

Turns out joke is on me, because he was totally right.... but in Central America, just because there are no roads to somewhere, doesn't mean they won't take you there on a bus.

A few minutes into the ride everyone on the bus tied hankerchiefs around their faces, covering their nose and mouth - lucky for me I had a pink one in my bag. Layers of dust coming in and out of the bus, thick enough that you couldn't see a few inches away from you. My sunglasses had a thick layer of dust when I took them off at a border. I asked the kid sitting next to me what was happening, which was probably the best thing I did all day. He was no older than 16, but one of the most pleasant people I met. He told me he was headed to Nicaragua for a reunion, and how he used to work at a hotel, but was now trying to do construction.

He was so glad I visisted the war museum, and asked if I would ever return. Throughout our bumpy dusty ride he pointed things out around us, I learned so much! He walked me to the bus station, and we parted ways. Not before he asked for my e-mail, saying "If we never see each other again, at least we'll have this" as I went to shake his hand goodbye, he pulled me in and kissed my cheek. Ladies watch out for this one!

The next day at a bus station I made friends with an Australian guy named Ben who was looking for an ATM. We rode the bus together to Managua. Arriving at night always makes it interesting. There was a group of people ahead of us, or kind of with us, which made it even more interesting. If you haven't experienced this before, you get to a town and walk to hotels looking for vacancies. You have no reservations, nothing is prebooked. You get nervous when there is a group of people also looking for rooms, because the possibility of being left without a place to stay is there... (IE...see my El Salvador arrival).

We were all bombarded with "taxi? taxi?" or locals offering to guide us to the hotel repeatedly saying "it's ok, no tip no tip!" Ben and I finally stumbled into a place that looked like someone's house. We asked for a room with 2 beds, and we agreed to share. It was the oddest shape room I've ever seen, one bed was behind the bathroom (which had no door or light), and the other bed was next to the door below a hanging tv. We were in no position to refuse even this place. Between hearing them reference to me as "la flaca bonita" (the skinny pretty girl) and finding a dirty sock hanging from the mirror, Ben and I could hardly contain our laughter.

We headed out on the direction of the street we were told was okay (we were told several times to under no conditions go the opposite way). We got dinner at a place with a disco ball - adding to our comedic mood, spinning around with lights as we were the only people there. We both got steak with Jalapeno sauce. The saucer that the sauce came in was Disney Princess theme, and the drink menu had pictures of women in lingerie posing next to the litter beers. The best picture on the menu was the one of a fish on a plate with four french fries on the side.

We headed back to the room, and decided to head to the airport for the 6:30am flight to the Corn Islands.

It was at this time last year I couldn't wait for night to turn to day so I could leave Managua and head out to the Islands of Nicaragua!

At This Time Last Year in Perkin El Salvador

2010-07-26T14:23:00.000-07:00

So I left you as I jumped on a bus heading out of San Salvador. On the bus I spotted 2 blonde guys and immediately made my way near them, only to hear them speak Spanish. I got off in San Miguel completely clueless as to where I was, or where to go next. My frustration in being alone started here, as I asked someone for help and they ask if I am from there... well hello...

I find my way to the right bus again, this one was a Pimp My Ride supped up school bus, no joke. Painted with lights, and stickers... I mean completely tricked out! A guy throws my bag under the bus, and the bus starts to leave without me... again...I run and grab the side, jump in - with a lump in my throat about to cry from frustration -but right as I walk in Spanish rock is blasting, and I start laughing, and have a big geeky smile on my face as I stumble to try to find a seat in this chicken bus. All kinds of interesting locals are inside, selling everything from socks to agua de coco in a bag (I always buy one) chips, plantains, to toothbrushes (I bought 2 for a dollar).

I arrived at El Perkin, and made my way to "Hotel Perkin Lenca" it was up on a hill on the side of the road... walking up 100 stairs with a huge backpack was a big challenge. After paying for my room, I realized I had to go up more hills to the very top of one where my room was. I don't care much for TV, but the loneliness on this trip was getting to me... especially here. This place was completely isolated, and I didn't see any other guests besides me. Every step I took closer to my room I prayed there was a tv to keep me entertained for a few hours. The rooms were beautiful colorful cabins, with hammocks on the front porches. Lots of trees...unlocked my door and two beds, and no tv. Sigh. I put my stuff on one of the beds, and laid on the other.

I spent the next day "downtown" - so small, yet my main reason for being there - the war museum. I held back the tears through every single picture and artifact I saw. This museum held so much sadness... the United States put El Salvador through so much... so many beautiful young souls died before their 18th birthday, before they got to go to college fighting a war against their own people. I also saw so much strength, so much hard work and brilliance... I got to walk into the FMLN's radio station that they literally ran underground for years without the U.S. government ever finding it. When I have a lot of money, I'd like to go back here and put time and money into the restoration of this place, so the strength of the El Salvadorian people is never forgotten.

The next day was St. Patricks day, and I started remeniscing of my St. Patricks day celebrations in San Francisco. I headed back down to the huge restaurant to have wine and ice cream alone. Much to my surprise a group of people all wearing green walked in a few minutes after me... I wanted them to invite me to hang out with them so bad, but I couldn't get the nerve to go up and talk to them. I stood up to pay for my ice cream and wine, just as one of the guys in their group got up as well. As I was about to leave he asks "de donde eres?" (where are you from?) and we struck up conversation. I was ecstatic, my heart almost fell out of my chest. Friends! And not just any kind of friends, Irish friends, on St. Patricks day... in middle of nowhere El Salvador!!!

I got to know a bit about him, although his name escapes me now, I remember he was working nearby as a civil engineer. I met their entire group, and there was this cute family on a trip around the world for 10 months with their 2 kids, both under the age of 14. Staying in hostels and being homeschooled through out their travels. After another glass of wine I went back to my room, smiling...

and it was at this time last year that "I drank with the Irish" on St. Patricks day in Perkin, El Salvador...

This Time....

2010-07-20T18:52:00.000-07:00

This time
I won't show I'm vulnerable
This time
I won't give in first
This time
I will hold out with my love
This time
I will not be hurt

I'm gonna love myself
More than anyone else
I'm gonna treat me right
I'm gonna make you say
That you love me first
And you'll be the one with the most to lose tonight
This time

This time
I won't let my emotions rule my life
This time
I'm gonna keep my heart looked safe inside
This time
I'm gonna be my own best friend
This time
I'm gonna be the one

To win
Your love
Your affection
To hide
My fear
Of rejection
This time

Swing Life Away

2010-07-05T20:05:00.000-07:00

Through the paths our lives have taken, I still smile at the thought of growing up with you, many times apart, many times together. I smile at the excitement in your laugh and your voice for things others take for granted. I smile at the changes and obstacles we reached together and apart, to find each other time after time, to forgive each other time after time again, to let each other go once more. I smile in gratitude for the memories we made, good and bad, and hope if you ever read this you smile too.

I remember before we had cars, the times you walked me home with your skateboard in hand.
When I bought you cigarettes before you could.
Watching crank yankers, and so many comedies - when my sandals broke walking around at the spectrum.
The Spectrum.
When we almost all got fired so you walked out on your break.
When you got really uncomfortable if I cried over a boy, so you'd stare at your food wishing I would stop.
When you brought me mango candy to work, and happened to drive by when you knew I got off so you could drive me home.
When your family didn't know I spoke Spanish, and your brother talked shit about me.
Game nights where we all laughed so hard we cried.
Prank calling people.
Food - loving food together -
My induction into shabu shabu, your biggest obsession (besides asian girls) - and waiting for you to ask the girl there - out.
When you helped me get over my past, when you put your arm around me and looked back to see if that guy noticed, because you knew I would ask.
When we both had no money, (many times... haha) so we made strange concoctions from my fridge or yours, or counted pennies for Carl's Junior dollar menu, extra ranch.
When you waited to watch the Dexter finale with me, until I got back from Mexico.
When you turned my picture frames upside down after C and I broke up.
Eating pho when hungover, or quite possibly still drunk.
Sunday Fundays, movie nights where I usually fell asleep.
Dance parties in your car.
When I'd step out of my front door to find packets of siracha you left for me.
When you woke me up at 4am by throwing mud at my window.

I could go on and on for days.

Happy Birthday JDA.

Love you always.

A This Time Last Year in El Salvador...

2010-07-02T13:19:00.000-07:00

I last left off as I was on my way out of Roatan...at this time last year I learned my lesson and rode on the top deck of the boat back to the mainland.

A boat ride, cab, pit stop, and 2 buses later I was on the last stretch to San Salvador, the capital of El Salvador. As I read in my guide book more about the country, I got a little bit nervous to be arriving there at night... The country averages 10 murders a day, solely from gang related activity. At this point anyone who didn't already think I was crazy, had no doubts, people told me to skip here... but my heart was set on stepping foot in a place I had read so much about.

I didn't plan it this way but I arrived at the capital on election night... everyone chanting "El Pueblo unido! jamas sera vencido!" (a town united will never be defeated!). In United States terms, this election was as big as when Obama became president. After almost 2 decades of a corrupt leader, the FMLN finally won. Every single car that I saw go by had flags and was yelling.

I got to a hotel as it was closing, and the lady inside told me they were completely booked. She was seriously concerned because she said I would not be able to find any vacancies anywhere. I ended up sleeping at this womans house, in a big conference room she had for hotel business. They set up a bed for me and charged me $12 to stay. I was completely clueless as to what to do the next day, and this wasn't a place anyone was on Spring Break alone, so I headed out to find some breakfast.

Pupusas, eggs, beans and bread for $2.15 (oh, fact... El Salvador's currency is dollars!). I took a mini van for 20 cents to downtown - I swear I'm never looking for dangerous situations, I just don't want to miss anything worth seeing. I walked into "Catedral metropolitana" a beautiful Church, per usual in these places...but this one had a Greek/Arabic feel to it - it was so cool. I decided to spend sometime in a library. A very nice man was so excited I asked for an English book section. Born in Maryland, his mother is Argentinian and he's been in El Salvador since 2002... he was delighted when I told him I used t live in San Francisco and told me "90% of people from El Salvador go to Frisco, and they don't like it called Frisco, but that's what I call it."

After meeting the nice man, and finding my favorite David Henry Thoreau quote in a book I had another "meant to be here moment." I made my way back, grabbed my stuff and took a cab to a bus station... Absolute chaos as there are buses going in every direction... a bus goes right by me as a guy hanging out the window yells "San Miguel plus?" and I know I want to take a bus to San Miguel, but I don't get the "plus" part... so while I'm running alongside the moving bus, he tells me it gets there in 2 hours instead of 3, I agree while still running, he grabs my bag puts his hand out and I jump into the moving bus.... so it was at this time last year I left San Salvador to find the town of Perkin El Salvador... in a hurry....

2010-06-17T09:33:00.000-07:00

I remember at a party, before I had any doubts about myself. I wore nothing glamorous back then, and I still got everyones attention. You looked at him the way he looked at me. Me and the rest of them sat there feeling sorry for you. You thought you were special, but we knew your shelf life was short. Next week there would be someone new in his life, but I'd always be there in between. Me, the one who got away, the one he never got to kiss. I held all the power. Each girl came and went thinking they could change him.

Years later I walk into a room full of people holding someone's hand and everyone's eyes are on me. I'm wearing a fancy dress, and heels I practiced walking in. People are curious but not impressed by me, they look away to avoid showing me the look in their eyes. They know I'll be gone soon, like the rest of them. I want to tell them, no not me... I'm different... I'm the girl guys fall in love with - stop looking at me like that! But they were right, I loose all control and I abruptly realize it's over.

So now I wonder, back then...when we sat there feeling sorry for these girls who couldn't see past the games, was that all they were? Or were there guys at home in love with them for years. Is everyone the same? Is one single girl someone's life long love, while at the same time she's disposable by the next, someone's best friend while someones most loathed enemy? Someone's one night stand, and someone's delicate treasure?

At this Time Last Year in Roatan, Honduras

2010-06-02T23:14:00.000-07:00

So at this time last year, I left off in the ruins of Copan...and headed to an Island called Roatan. I left my little hotel room early in the morning and walked on the cobblestone roads, past a soccer field to a bus station.

At the waiting area of the docks, which looked more like a hospital waiting room than anything; I made friends with a guy named Rob, who was from Southern California. He was volunteering at an orphanage, but was going to Roatan to meet up with friends from the states. We sat and talked while I ate a very questionable sandwich and a bag of chips, from the cafeteria.

We board the boat (much like the Catalina Flyer) and Rob and I sat downstairs by the TV... I should have seen it coming when as you enter, the attendants hand you barf bags...but alas we sat and the boat took off.

Now let me drop a disclaimer on my sea-sickness, I grew up on boats! Growing up in Puerto Vallarta, there was a time where my family and I actually literally lived on a sail boat. While I was known to get car sick, I pranced around more comfortably on any water device than I ever did on land....

With that said let me tell you this was the bumpiest, most intense boat ride I have ever been in. 20 minutes in and the unexpected jumps, jolts and bumps were huge. I started to sweat bullets, and could barely hold on. Not to mention that questionable sandwich started to haunt me. I felt like I was running to the bathroom in slow motion, every time I tried to take a step the boat lifted, and my body flung to the side, or up to the point where I was literally floating, until harshly landing again. After falling, jumping, pulling, and grabbing on to anything possible I made it to the bathroom just in time to notice I was locked out. I just so happened to be holding the barf bag in my hand, so I pushed my back against a wall to try to keep from falling and everything I had eaten that day went into that tiny blue bag.

30 minutes later the bottom deck of the boat looked like a hospital. There were buckets everywhere, babies screaming, and people running outside to throw up. I wish I was embelishing this story, but this actually happened. Round two, my jaw tightened up and I didn't even have time to get up, I used another bag right at my seat while Rob sat there fixated on the made for tv movie- that I don't even think was in English.

We finally arrived at our destination and I was looking as good as ever. The cabs worked the way they did at most Latin American countries I visited- there is a fixed rate for the car, you are paying the same whether there is one person or 4, so we set out to recruit 2 more. I sat by the window on the taxi drive letting the air hit me, wantint to be in one place and never leaving it again.

Since it was late at night, and I had no idea where I was staying, I made conversation with the 2 new guys. Rob I already knew was staying with some friends on the more expensive side of the island. Turned out the 2 guys we recruited didn't even know each other, one of them was visiting family- and the other Noah was here on spring break... by himself?! Bingo, hello new friend! I think I decided I liked him the second he asked the taxi driver if he had some reggeton, not to mention he was wearing a Brazil flag on his head. We got out of the cab in the middle of a dirt road, water infront of us, and streches of shops, bars, hostels and hotels to our left and to our right. We decided to walk to some places together.

A place called Chillie's had one room available with 3 beds, and a fan. Unsure as to what level my 5 minute old friendship with Noah stood, I wasn't sure if it was appropriate for us to share a room. Then he says "this works, you can have the big bed." Next thing you know, we've paid $20 for our room and headed out to a restaurant nearby called Cannibal cafe, sharing a burrito BFF style- talking like we have been friends for years.

Our similarties were many, he was also from Cali, but studying at American University in D.C., Jewish and obsessed with traveling, along with passionately obsessed with Argentina and Brazil. Every part of his soul had the latino passion hand movements when he told stories, you couldn't help but laugh and be entertained by anything he said. We headed back to our room and anxiously waited for the next day so we could swim in paradise.

Every morning we ended up waking up at about 6:45am, walking to get pastries and coffee, or some sort of breakfast- which even with speaking Spanish fluently was difficult to order. We would buy a bottle of water from a market, and then head to a dock to catch a water taxi for 50 limpiras each ($3.00) to West Bay. We had huge dorky smiles every time as the boat made a turn on the bay, starring in awe at the incredible colors of the water.

We would lay in the beach, laughing, go in and swim, lay out some more. We soon realized the beaches were very empty on the days that no cruise ships came in. The good thing about cruise days was that the bars on the beach had 'bananarama' 2 for one specials.

One day we got food from a woman on the beach. We paid 100 limpiras for a fried (and cold) fish, a slice of avocado, rice, beans and tortillas. We had coconut bread that didn't taste at all like coconut...we tried and failed miserably at finding real coconuts with coconut water that we could mix with rum, and no luck finding plantains... in a caribbean island... hmmm.... yet we laughed the entire time.

"I can't wait to have some really good Honduran good when I get back to D.C." - Noah

Usually we took a water taxi back at 4ish. One day we found a good happy hour on our side of the island- so we drank away Noah's lobster red tan, and my heat rash. Went to nap in the room at about 6 or 7pm, and both woke up at 1:30am laughing at how much money we saved by not going out. I think I slept in sandy sheets in my bathing suit every night that we were there. I'd wake up and look over to the last bed and see Noah struggling to get out of bed to put on aloe vera on his burns - then be ready to be in the sun again.

One night we got pizza "downtown" that I believe was made by a witch, drank beers, and goofed around by the sand. I have no words or pictures to describe the beauty of this place. After spending only a single day in Roatan, I would have been satisfied if my trip ended there and then.

Many people to this day still ask me how I possibly went on such a long trip all alone, wasn't I scared that I didn't know anyone? Wasn't it dangerous etc. Although I can't say I wasn't lonely, it was experiences like this... meeting the one kid from D.C. who went to a random Island in Central America for his spring break, while all his classmates went to Florida, that reminded me I was right where I was meant to be.

Swimming in the most beautiful crystal clear water I have ever seen, drinking banana strawberry shakes made by a bossy Caribbean woman, writing down my adventures, eating fried fish, seeing the sunset in purples and reds, being sunkissed is what I was doing at this time last year in Roatan Honduras, and I couldn't have been any happier.

"Make no mistake, life is life."

2010-05-10T11:10:00.001-07:00

I can't tell what's been going on in my life lately. Connections from the past coming back, things I said I'd never do, things I always wanted to, breaking my own rules, allowing change, forcing change, failing at letting go. I keep sleeping a lot, almost every hour - although they are few - that I am not working I try to read, write or watch a movie, but I sleep. I can't tell what is going on, and I don't think I'm supposed to know yet. I feel like I am in some alternate reality, on every drug possible. I heard this song yesterday, and I cannot stop listening to it. I feel everything about it right now.

Happy Birthday Brooke

2010-04-30T11:00:00.000-07:00

It's the last day in April, and rather than my monthly Mango in 10 for 2010. I'm writing this one to my best friend, at the end of her birthday month.

I've been lucky to have Brooke in my life since highschool, one of the most talented and driven runner's I knew, years above her peers in maturity (almost as mature as me, and hello she's two years younger) and one of the most secure, strong, confident, happy, and drama-free people I know.

After highschool Brooke and I didn't see each other very often, until our 'reunion' for her 21st birthday in San Diego. Brooke often tells me how myself along with my group of friends brought her out of her shell. How I inspire her to be more outspoken, more outgoing, a faster go-getter, to say how she feels, and I like hearing all that... but sometimes I wonder if she realizes that she's had just as much of an impact on my life, if not more than I have had in hers...

Her influence over my life is huge, she's one of the people I trust the most. Her opinion is golden, because she speaks from the heart. She doesn't hesitate to tell me I'm dating a complete asshole, my outfit needs help, or telling me when I messed up. She doesn't sugar coat her words when she speaks to me, because she knows no matter how much I wanted her to tell me the guy I'm dating just hasn't called because he's busy, my outfit is 'unique' or what I did is ok, that she is right and in the end I'll thank her. Equally her compliments are just as honest and raw, if she's a fan of my work, or she supports my goals, I feel proud.

My favorite times are with her, no matter what we do, we're always laughing. She's dropped everything to drive to my house when I was the most down I've ever been, and watched hours of trashy television to try to cheer me up. She's been my wingwoman when she had to wake up early the next day, but I wanted so badly for us to stay out with the boy I liked. She's proofread my resume, loaned me her clothes, driven when I drank, sent me letters in the mail just because, gone shot by shot with me, baked me cookies, supported my events, inspired me with her blog. Driven to Vegas with me, leaving a nightclub when the sun was out, visited me in Tahoe, spent weekends with me in San Francisco.

Last summer we met up in Ibiza and Barcelona during our epic backpacking trips. I didn't think I could love this girl more than I already did, then we were sharing tapas drinking Sangria surrounded by all things Spanish feeling the breeze of the ocean, riding a scooter with Spanish boys and I thought how lucky I was to have such an amazing friend.

On her birthday this year, we went skydiving, probably one of the best days of my life. To jump 1200 feet out of a plane with your best friend is pretty epic. Everything Brooke does is real, inspiring and simple. Simple in the most amazing of ways, she never complicates things, she doesn't doubt her self, she makes decisions and is always happy with them.

Another year younger, I am so happy we are both living in the same city again, I am so happy we jumped out of a plane together, and I am so happy for the summer that awaits us. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEST FRIEND!

Slut.

At This Time Last Year...Bus Hopping Honduras

2010-04-29T10:00:00.000-07:00

In my last 'at this time last year' I left you at the Guatemalan/Honduras border... which was the start of my adventure completely alone.

After getting dropped off at a bus stop, I sat in a charter bus that was supposed to take me to Honduras. We got to a bus stop where everyone got off, so I asked the bus driver if he remembered where I was going, he told me to run and get into a van that was driving by us.

I ran with my backpacks and luckily barely got into a van with 30 people in it. I wish I was exagerating the number of people in there, but I actually counted. This van dropped me off in the middle of a deserted road, after having some guys knee stuck on my side for 25 minutes. Another van picked me up that went the opposite direction of where we were going...and eventually we stopped. Near the border. So after much confusion as to what to do, I realized you literally walk through the border. They check your passport, you pay a fee and you are in the next country.

The Honduras Bird

Yet another van was waiting in Honduras offering rides to hostels and hotels, so I took one... Even though I knew better, I took the drivers offer to drop me off at a hotel that belonged to his family. The place was actually really nice and it was only $10 a night, I was exhausted so I took it. There were hammocks everwhere, it had an internet cafe, hot water and a t.v. I got pupusas and took them to my room, where I proceeded to watch telenovelas, cry and fall asleep.

The next morning I woke up, and thankfully was done being lonely - I blame my emotional breakdown at the hotel, completely on exhaustion...not the fact that I was so scared to have left the only familiar face I knew miles and miles away. The town I was in was called Copan, and it has a lot of Mayan ruins. So the natural choice was to check those out.

In daylight the town was very cute, cobblestone roads, beautiful buildings, and a very calm vibe - like most Central American countries, but for a City, not a beach town, it had a peaceful beach town feel.

I met some people at the ruins and together we hired a guide to show us around. Since the rest of the people were in couples, and I spoke Spanish, the guide talked to me the most. I get lost in ruins, they are so amazing to me. The craziest part is always thinking of how much more is still under ground that we will never see. One of my favorite stories he told us was about Jaguar. Legend says, he swallowed the sun and went into the underworld to figh the evil Gods, then when he came back he 'puked' up the sun. So there is this temple with two Jaguars guarding the sun as they dance.

This last picture is of a place where they would behead people, allowing the blood to flow down.

After the tour, the guide- Juan Carlos- showed me where I could buy tickets to go to the Islands...and sure enough as I was ready to part ways with him, he asks if I'd like to go to "some pools" with him, and next thing you know I'm in some awkward date situation in a strange country. Ofcourse, I say yes, only because I've done the only thing to do in the town, and buses to the ferry don't leave until the next day. So we agreed to meet up in a few hours and I headed to a coffee shop to do some writing.

So Juan Carlos and I meet up a few hours later, and his name, turned out, wasn't even Juan Carlos, it was Mauricio - I tend to be bad with names no matter where I am. We went to a pool in a resort, and on our walk there every single person we passed on the street said "hola hermano," "hola primo." He laughed at me when I asked if he was really related to every single person in the town, and explained that it's just a greeting - but yes growing up in such a small town, everyone knows him.

We spent hours at the pool laughing, speaking in Spanish drinking lemonades. He is the youngest of 6 kids, living with one of his sisters, next to their house is his sisters restaurant on one side, and his brothers cell phone shop on the other. Eventually we got traditional food on a rooftop restaurant, where he pointed things out from the town.

This was the day that I watched "El Rudo y Cursi" which alas is the reasoning behind - Mango, my like for Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna grew more than I thought possible after watching this movie. A very insignificant part, which most people probably didn't notice, Diego's character, every time he's on the phone with his wife calls her Mango, or Manguito as a sign of endearment. I thought it was one of the cutest things I had ever heard.

No one else thought it was as funny or interesting as I did, but I started using it, then people started calling me it, and it just stuck...

When I headed back to my hotel, Juan Car...er Mauricio asked me to stay another day, and he'd buy me a different bus ticket to the ferry a day later... I shrugged it off with a laugh, and made plans to meet up with him for dinner that I knew I had no intention to follow through on.

I left the next morning on a bus before the sun was out, and it was at this time last year that I left the Mayan ruins of Copan and headed to San Pedro, Honduras...

#9. Get a Car

2010-04-28T17:45:00.000-07:00

One of the most essential things on my 101 things to do in 1001 days is now complete.

I got a car!!!!

Now, if you have known me for a while, you had the pleasure of meeting Kia... my white 1999 Kia Sephia, bought with a pell grant I got for getting good grades ( I am so smart s-m-r-t)... although the money didn't go to pay for school, it was probably a better financial decision to put that money into a car, than what I did with my next grant- go to Costa Rica for a month... but back to the car... to make a long story short Kia served her purpose, but after a couple of years, needed fixing that was more than the car was worth.

By that time I was living in San Francisco, and got along fine without a car, I had no intentions of returning to Southern California, and traveling awaited me...so, money into a car was money taken away from traveling. Kia and I parted ways as she was picked up by some animal organization as a donation (I added this donation tid bit to remind my hater that "humble is not in my vocabulary and I only do good things to be recognized for them").

Alas, I traveled and spent every bit of money I had, flew into LAX and into reality last August a few hours before I started working in the same night club I worked when I lived here.

8 months... I went 8 months without a car, going from temp job to temp job, riding bikes, borrowing people's cars, getting dropped off, bribing people for rides, paying people to use their car, and figuring out bus schedules, for almost a year.

In March I did my taxes, and somehow only working 4 months of the year gave me a bigger return than when I worked full time for 2 years... I put that money away for a car, and set my mind in buying one in the beginning of April. The same week I decided to go into a dealership, a completely unexpected gift towards the purchase of my car was given to me. I can't wait until I can pay it forward...

My sister in law went to the dealership with me...we found the car I wanted. We set a price to each other and went inside to "talk numbers" with the dealer. Now, I had seen her deal with customer service issues, but the way she talked to the salesman can only be referred to as an artform. Iam surprised he didn't cry. Every offer he made I was ready to say "I'll take it!" She would look at him straight in the eye, and say "that's not good enough, it's not what we asked for." So he would go talk to his boss, come back, give us a new offer.... and completely calm she would say "we don't have all day, I told you what we can pay, I know you can do it, if you're not going to we're leaving." I would think EVERYTIME, that he would respond by telling us: "then leave." Nope, left yet again to come back with another offer... My heart was beating so fast, they eventually were fighting over $9.00!!!

"That's $9.00 more a month than she can pay" - sister in law
"Well what's $9.00 really?" - salesman
"What's $9.00 to you?" - sister in law
"Lunch! That's nothing!" - salesman
"Then you can pay for it" - sister in law

So he leaves again, coming back with a final offer with the monthly payment we wanted, and almost 3 grand less than the original price.

I signed the paperwork, handed over the check and drove off the lot a proud owner of BB.. a 2005 Toyota corolloa :)

about to drive off the lot for the first time!

sunroof/munroof :)

Picasso meet BB, BB meet Picasso

I am so excited to finally have a car again. I have so many new opportunities I can take advantage of now, and no need to wait around for people to pick me up :) I am so thankful.

#68. TBD

2010-04-28T16:59:00.001-07:00

April 2010

Growing

2010-04-15T13:58:00.000-07:00

I absolutely believe in miracles, unexpected gifts and big breaks. I believe however, those things are still self manifested - by believing these things happen to begin with, you are open to the reality of them coming to you.

I've been thinking a lot about patience and relationships and achieving goals. Goals that cannot be accomplished by a single phone call or in the blink of an eye.

This morning my roommate and I hung out before work to catch up on our lives. We couldn't stop talking about the new opportunities in our life, and how it's so great to not only have good jobs now, but job prospects knocking at our door after so many unemployment struggles. Long gone are the days of going to coffee shops for free wifi, and counting quarters to get the dollar menu at el pollo loco. It took us some time though...

My best friend and I have been talking about relationships, and the correlation of our lives in both our recent past relationships. A quick fall, followed by a quick crash and burn. Leading us back to believe that a good healthy relationship needs some time...

Talking to some friends looking for new direction, and to get out of struggles; as my life usually does - coming in complete circle looping back around so everything ties together- my only advice to them has been to be positive and patient...

I remembered a poem I read taped on a friends mirror, it said something like this:

Plant a seed in a pot, take care of it and water it. Go on with your life and work on the changes you would like to make, push towards your goals, pursue the life you want. When things aren't going your way, run back to the pot with the seed you planted... and remember it takes time for things to grow!

This poem has stuck in the back of my mind. Good things take time, and they are worth fighting for. They are worth taking care of, knowing once they are deeply rooted - they won't crumble with change, or hardships - the way a fast growing weed will.

So a reminder to my friends and myself... be resilient, be positive, be happy and be patient. It's worth it.

2010-04-11T20:53:00.000-07:00

Hold your own, know your name, go your own way, and everything will be fine.

Put a Flower in Your Hair

2010-04-09T10:29:00.000-07:00

When I was a freshman in college, my cross-country team went to the bay area to compete in the Stanford invitational, in Palo Alto. We spent the rest of the weekend in San Francisco. Within minutes of stepping into the city I felt home. It was then and there I decided I had to live in this city.

I still remember the rush of blood to my head 2 years later when I got my acceptance letter to school up there. I was in my oceanography class... summer came and went, I packed my stuff and moved to SF.

It's hard to put in words the experiences and things I did in the 4 years I spent there. My first college roommate on campus (for the low price of $850 each, to share a room) became and is still one of my best friends. We explored that city like it was our job. We had the best sushi, turned 21 together, fell in love with Jameson and gingers, discovered Thai iced tea, went to free concerts at the park, watching Dolly Parton perform is still one of my best memories... We hiked the Muir woods, did Halloween at the Castro before it got shut down, stumbled through bay to breakers, danced nights away in the city, went to protests, took people sight seeing, had sundaes at Ghirardelli square all alongside each other. We graduated together and she saw me trip on stage after getting my diploma in front of thousands of people...

Our first picture together, look how young we were :)

After moving around after graduation, Orange County, Pismo, and Lake Tahoe...we both returned to the bay.... I was lucky enough to live in the sunset district next to the beach, and Marin County with an ocean view... but it was time for real metropolitan city life. We both got "real jobs" and I got a studio in lower nobb hill.

It was like the first time I moved to San Francisco all over again, something totally new. I was 4 blocks away from union square, in the heart of downtown, in an incredible studio with a loft bed. I walked 10 minutes to work in the financial district, every day feeling like I was in a movie. You could walk one block in any direction from my apartment and be at any bar, coffee shop, Thai food place, art studio, gallery etc.

Rooftop Magazine shoot

Pre-Slide

Power to the Peaceful with Iyar!

OutsideLands Music Festival at Golden Gate Park

North Beach Festival. I had just gotten back from Italy with this jacket, and ran into my soulmate!

New Years 2009 at City Hall

My neighbors were interesting little creatures slash struggling artists slash in bands and slash way too cool for me, but I got to know almost everyone in my building - that it wasn't odd for someone to knock on my door at any point of the day to borrow a movie, say what’s up, or to go grab a drink at the bar next door. Ah... the bar next door... had a "pretty glad hour" and always interesting things going on.

Time came and went, and it was time to leave the city.... but the memories San Francisco made in my heart play through my head at all times. When I hear a song, when it rains, when I have good food, when I laugh, when I get lost...

MOMA

Go Giants!

Full House/ Seven Sisters

Eddy and I at City Hall New Years. DJ Remeddy

Sunny day at Dolores Park

My 24th birthday

Bay 2 Breakers 2008. White Trash Family.

My black and white 21st birthday party, and Ambassador.

Bay 2 Breakers- Circus. 420 at Hippy Hill. Aldo & I at Jumpstart.

Kiss me I'm a Virgo birthday. 330 with the ladies.

I think of the first time I drove across golden gate bridge and watched the fog rolling through. I think of eating clam chowder bowls at the pier. I think of Industry Hump Day nights at the Ambassador, going for one drink and staying all night...hurting Thursday mornings at work... I think of after hours at the marina houses, late night eats at Ihop. I think of eating at Golden Gate Park, on hippy hill. I think of venturing down Haight street. I think of New Years 2009 at City Hall - the best New Years of my life. Halloween at 330 Ritch and "the music still playing." I think of walking down Market street alongside thousands of people pushing for immigrant rights. I think of ice skating downtown, Cheesecake factory overlooking the buildings, trips to Berkeley, Ocean Beach, George's Zoo tuna melts, feeing homeless people at Glide, dinner parties in the Richmond district, laughing Buddha’s, Japanese tea gardens, Dolores Park, volunteering at planned parenthood, the amazing-ness of Polk street, north beach festival, Naan & Curry, the mission district in all its vibrant colors, protestors, trolley rides....on and on...

I'm going back to San Francisco tonight after almost a year, can't wait to make new memories...I'm putting a flower in my hair!

Mango in 10 for March 2010

2010-03-29T20:43:00.000-07:00

March has come and gone, let's see how I did with my Mango in 10 for 2010.

New Things
1. Do things all out. Focus on details and effort this year. No more going through the motions.

I did my best this month. All out at work, all out with friends, all out in almost every situation I put myself in, I told myself "if I never get this opportunity again, will I walk away from it satisfied?"

2. Cook 2 new recipes a month

My friend Brooke has started doing Cross Fit and is now eating mostly Paleo. Her influence over my life is quite big, so I've been learning about Paleo eating - I am by no means fully paleo, but my recipes this month are mostly paleo. I made paleo pad thai with shrimp, then tried it with chicken and spaghetti squash - both were absolutely delicious. Also made turkey tacos, using lettuce instead of tortillas.

3. Do 365 challenges in "This Book Will Change Your Life"

Totally failed at this one. I think I did a few of the challenges at the beginning of the month, but I focused on so many other things. I'll have to catch up in the next few months.

4. Become a Tourist in SoCal

Passed this one with flying colors! Went out in Hollywood to a place I had never been, Teddy's at the Roosevelt, went out to the bars in downtown Fullerton, went out in Santa Ana, tried a new coffee shop in Laguna, had sushi in Newport at the Cannery, went to JLounge in LA...etc

5. Try to do something: history , science: I have to keep up a medical blog at work, because of it I had to do some intensive research on gastric bypass and gastric bypass... interesting, math, literature, art, music, philosophy: I re-read about the 80/20 theory, and learned it originated from Italian economist who said 80 % of wealth belonged to 20% of Italy. and religion every month.

On Going
6. Write every day. I wrote a lot the first two weeks, the last two weeks I couldn't find time to save my life.

7. Workout 3-4 a week. Hard. Above and beyond, I worked out mostly 5-6 days a week, and started P90x.

8. Read 12 Books. One per month. This is one I was confident I never wouldn't complete. Adding up the parts of books I read adds up to a book or more, but I didn't finish an entire book, rather started 3 or 4. Focus!

9. Try new things. Every day. Still have this one down!

10. Pray/Mediate. As much as possible. At all moments of most of my days

#52. Make Yelp Elite

2010-03-26T08:28:00.000-07:00

I've been waiting for this moment since I started Yelping almost a year ago...from MY 101 Things to do in 1001 Days... drum roll... I present to you my OC Yelp Elite Squad invitation, nomination and now official Yelp Elite status.

We'd officially like to invite you to join the 2010 Yelp Elite Squad!

*insert crowd roar here*

That's right, we think you have exactly what it takes to be a part of the best and brightest on Yelp, and more importantly, to keep on doing it. We want you to keep those fantastic reviews coming in, continue to make your cool insider tips lists, get active on Talk and invite more of your friends to join in the fun! You can go here to find out a bit more: www.yelp.com/elite

As a member of the Elite, you'll be invited to attend exclusive parties and events that we throw at yummy local restaurants, bars, shows, galleries and boutiques all over OC. As a result, you'll get a chance to experience new places and meet and mingle with other cool yelpers. You'll have that nifty red badge on your profile that you can brag to all of your friends about, and you can do so while rocking your complimentary members-only, limited edition Yelp Elite schwag!

By accepting this invitation, you'll be one of the voices and faces of Yelp Elite -- in essence our ambassadors both on and offline - so all we ask is that you commit to keep "yelping" about your favorite restaurants and clubs, your doctor, your mechanic, your hair salon, or really anything that's local and would help others to know about! We want you to keep telling your friends about Yelp and encourage them to invite their friends as well (the more people yelping, the more useful and fun the site becomes). We also ask that you contribute positively to the site and do your part to set an example of what a stellar yelper can and should be.

If you're interested, just let me know, and I'll send along the request to Yelp HQ in San Francisco for final approval!

Until then, SYOY,
-Hazel Q

I accepted (duh) - Time to nerd out and celebrate! I am SO excited!!!

Hi Hater

2010-03-24T22:29:00.000-07:00

I just got this comment on my last blog entry:

After I read your blog, I thought the people of Hati, Congo, and other Thrid World countries with a combined GDP of three dollars had it rough. You totally changed my perspective on what difficult is. If you can survive a "shitty two months," then maybe the annihilation of Darfur will cease.

Dear anonymous,

I think you meant to write 'before' reading my blog not 'after.' I'll start off by saying your cowardness to post as anonymous shows your character, or lackthere of - and finish off by saying your world news and wikipedia research for the facts you included in your comment must make you feel proud, informed and maybe even involved in aiding the worlds poverty... But I'll be direct with you when I say that I've not only read up on third world countries, I have lived, worked and volunteered in 3 different 3rd world countries for 12 years of my life- not including a year of service I completed in an inner city school in the bay area.

I volunteer with various charities and organizations on a regular basis, fed homeless people every weekend for the last year I lived in the bay, volunteered hours upon hours at planned parenthood, and have volunteered my only days off to spend with orphans in Tijuana, or putting together food drives - this doesn't even begin to cover it. I pride myself in helping my friends and family reach their goals. I bring people together, I network and although it doesn't include writing anonymous comments on people's blogs, I make a difference in people's life. I do not need to be told about life in poverty, and how it compares to my life, because I've experienced it first hand.

Nowhere in my blog entry did I compare my 'shitty' two months to life in Haiti or Darfur. You are pathetic to compare the two- I have risen from circumstances I don't need to share, in which I don't allow myself to be a victim, and enjoy the life I worked for. My intentions have never been to change your perspective of what difficult means, because I don't even know who YOU are - besides a coward. I constantly work on improving the person that I am, to give back to the world what was given to me. For that I am not ashamed, but thankful, greatful and happy. You on the otherhand should find a source of happiness that doesn't include trying, but surely failing to bring negativity into a blog that isn't focused on your intro to world studies class.

Thanks for stopping by!!! :)

P.S. you misspelled Haiti...and the word third.

Come Come Summertime

2010-03-19T11:24:00.000-07:00

2010 came whether I was ready or not. This doesn't happen often, because I pride myself in making every year better than the last - but unfortunately this year didn't start off with a bang. While rining in 09 made for the best New Years of my life, ringing in 2010 devastatingly rung in as the worse. Slowly but surely I came to the realization that I was stuck, and surrounded by a few people that had nothing but their own interest in mind.

I struggled through job application, job interview, hopes up, then no call. I got hired somewhere and the company went under on my third day. I worked a temp job with potential of it turning into something permanent - three weeks later the person I was covering for came back. I went through a breakup that drained me. Through the pain of that, came a big sense of relief. While I couldn't pin point the exact reasons why I had to end the relationship, in the depths of my soul the satisfaction of knowing I did the right thing allowed me to recover faster than anyone expected. I held on to the belief that I would rather be alone, than to settle in a relationship where I wasn't a priority.

While my best friends expected me to crack at anytime, from my love recovery, I quickly started a series of very comedic dates...

I went on a date with a guy who told me how happy he was I was as pretty as he remembered, because last time he met a girl at a club (not like he goes out very much, and rarely ever drank), in daylight was missing part of her eyebrow. He accidentally spit his gum out on my lap. I went on a date with another guy, that took me to all these fun places, yet asked me the same questions over and over, while not forgetting to bring up his ex as often as possible. A guy with a girlfriend pursued me, from the hours of 2 to 4A.M., douche bag number 76 got my number the same night that he gave his to my friend. Ghost of ex fling pasts came back into my life only to remind me that since we didn't work when we were 18, we sure as hell weren't going to work at 25. My "friend" suggested that the only possible thing to do now that I was single was to have a threesome with him and my roommate.

My room and apartment became a cave with piles of clothes, unread mail, and unopened books. Being back from traveling for 7 months with no steady job, and a complete new sense of lack of direction hit me hard......The disadvantages of not having a car kept me loosing out on opportunities I wanted badly to pursue, and the frustration of feeling so helpess really got to me. When things just didn't seem to slow down, a pretty fucked up thing - for lack of a better explanation- happened at my night job - ultimately making me want to crawl into a hole for a while... still my friends awaited the "postponed break up - breakdown" - but it never came.

Through the shitty first 2 months of the year, although my logical self screamed "don't do it!" I did the 'crazy ex' facebook stalking... I held my breath knowing nothing good could come from it, and boy was I wrong. The sense of overwhelming relief that I felt when all the doubts in my mind were confirmed by just a few clicks, made me so proud of following my gut instinct and ending that relationship when I did. I can with no doubt say ending that relationship is the best thing to have happened to me this year.

March has been my New Year. I've worked my body harder than the rest of the year, I've done so many new things, and my life in almost every single aspect has improved tenfold. Maybe it was the warm weather starting up again that made everything begin to change... but I forced myself to take responsibility for my life and it's direction, as I have done in the past. I let go of people and habits that weren't helping me to grow, I became more strict with putting my health first, and I kept pushing for new experiences. I worked harder to manage my money. I remembered to be more thankful, I stopped looking for this and that, and thanked life more.

This last Friday, I woke up to 'Pursuit of Happiness' by Kid Cudi. I smiled as the weeks events replayed in my head. Saw the sun shining, and had the same giddy smile on my face that I've had for a while. I planned on being home to get chores done all day, then my friend Kelly invited me to have breakfast by the beach, and getting chores done lost all importance. We walked around in the sun, I fell asleep at the pool with Brooke, we watched trashy television and danced in her car. In those moments I was there, I was there...and no where else, laughing with my best friend wearing aviators as the sun kissed my skin.

I thanked God for the sun, and what feels like the beginning of the best summer... I thanked God for the amazing music we heard at open mic night, the ridiculous karaokee downtown, the sangria at Lola Gaspar, the sleep overs in my living room, the boat parties where everyone lost each other, Irish car bombs on St. Patricks day, working out 3 times a day with my roommate, running into a boy and finally having the right timing, going on a date where I wasn't looking at my watch wanting to leave... but wanting the night to not end, getting butterflies and having good conversation, going to LA to "another country" at the Roosevelt and late night dinner in a Casino, sneaking boxed wine into the dollar theatre, laying out at the pool drinking iced tea, having happy hour at the Claim Jumper, ordering pizza and watching Mean Girls for the 156,679 time and still laughing like we'd never seen it before, day drinking 'White Trash Iced Tea' in Newport Beach people watching, picking up on girlfriends, getting coffee by the beach, walking around at the beach, laying out at the beach, talking at the beach, laughing at the beach.

Everything about these last couple of weeks has been perfect. So I thank the sun, and thank the ocean - the same ocean that is connected to all the beaches I have been to... the beach I played in every Sunday with my grandparents as a child in Manzanillo and Puerto Vallarta, the beaches in Southern California where I first body boarded, the beaches I swam in Costa Rica after working all day, the beaches in Thailand that were the first to feel my tattoo, the beaches in the Caribbean Islands where the crystal clear water made you feel like you were in a dream.

I reorganized, and you can see the floor in our apartment again - beached out and thankful for every bit of sand and sun.... when I least expected it, I got a job offer for a job I interviewed for 2 months ago... now offering higher pay than they did back when I really wanted it. For once, it's not temporary, and it's not scanning invoices, or answering phones. I get to write blogs for a web design firm, and work on their social media. I am so excited to learn and grow from this, I still can't believe it's real. This overwhelming sense of happiness and change didn't come easy, but it's so plain to see now that I had to get rid of all the bad to let the good back in. I can't wait to see what else is in store in my life... I am ready for it, all the good and the bad - I love living here, and can't imagine being anywhere else right now - Come come summertime... I am so ready for your summer California...

At This Time Last Year... I said goodbye to Guatemala...

2010-03-15T18:53:00.000-07:00

"Por favor no tire la vasura en este bus...para eso estan las ventanas"

That sentence translates to "Please don't throw trash in this bus, that's what the windows are for." While it's kind of funny, this is one of the many problems this little town in Guatemala has. Awareness about enviornmental issues, education, health etc. is very low.

While taking this bus to a school, Amanda mentioned she has told the bus drivers to put trash cans in the buses, but no one cares much about being clean.

The rest of my time in Guatemala was quiet and very peaceful. I read "The Dalai Lama : The Compassionate Life" after finishing "The Witch of Portobello" and spent a lot of time talking to Amanda, laughing, dreaming, and just being.

Apart from the classes Amanda teaches, she has a women's group where she was teaching women in the town how to knitt. It was so heart warming to see these women sitting around in a circle with 5 month old babies tied around behind their back, completely calm and happy.

During a girls meeting, Amanda baked coffee cake with them, and as they were all headed home, one came up to me and told me one day she would like to learn to make Mexican tacos. :)

After my last week there, we headed to Semuc Champey. One of the most beautiful places I have ever been to. Our hotel was nothing short of horrible, a tiny damp and sticky room with two questionable beds, bugs were easy to spot... but we managed. ( The only reason you see us smiling in the picture below is because by this point we were too tired to be upset, so we just laughed about it.) We were in an adventure tour, so we met a group of people from Ireland, the Netherlands, and Turkey.

The next morning we took off in the back of a pick up truck through the mountains and trees, as one of the guides grabbed a berry and painted our faces orange with it. We hiked, and I was absolutely exhausted. the tired-ness of it all completely melted away from my body and my face as soon as we reached the top and saw the amazing view of water. I can't even describe the beauty of these pools, and greenery.

After resting, we hiked down to the water and swam in it.... followed by the scarriest thing I have ever done. Bar none. We were told we would be going into some caves, and I imagined we would just be swimming around them. Our group was all given candles, and we headed inside this huge water cave. I didn't even have time to freak out, because I didn't understand what was to follow. But as soon as we were away from the entrance, the only thing guiding us were these candles. It was pitch black, as we swam, hiked, climbed through caves, sand, rocks. The guide would tell us to swim around to the right to avoid rocks, grab on to the left, keeping our candle out of the water. For an entire hour and a half!

While at the last point of our stop, before heading back the way we came in, we all put our candles out and sat in completely silence and darkness. It was a surreal experience to think if I were alone it would be nearly impossible to know in which direction to go to head to the outside.

Having skydived, white water rafter level 4 water, and ziplined through the highest zip line in Central America, I can still safely say this was the scarriest thing I have ever done.

We finished the adventure tour by rafting down a river, in intertubes.

On our way back to Semuc Champey I was dropped off at "El Rancho" to take a bus to Honduras. With my heart beating fast, and a freaked out feeling in the pit of my stomach I left Amanda behind to continue on this journey to new countries alone... so it was at this time last year...I said goodbye to Guatemala, and crossed the Honduras border...

#78. Try Biscuits and Gravy

2010-03-05T07:00:00.000-08:00

From my 101 things to do in 1001 days list... I had biscuits and gravy. On Valentines day this year, my friends and I went to Hamburger Mary's in Long Beach for a drag queen show, breakfast buffet and all you can drink mimosas. Although the food was not anything to write home about, it gave me the chance to try biscuits and gravy!

Well.... I have not much else to say. For some reason I expected the biscuits to be softer, and for me to have some strange epiphany about how my life ever went on without trying these, but I think I'll be okay if biscuits and gravy and I don't cross paths again soon.

At This Time Last Year... Guatemala

2010-03-04T08:15:00.000-08:00

On February 26 of 2009 I left the Mexico City airport on a first class flight to Guatemala... wether that was my own doing, or the airlines fault I'll never know. I do know, however, that it was nice to have a gourmet meal before leaving most comforts...

My friend Amanda was, and still is finishing up her peace corps project in Guatemala, so I went to see her and her site, along with our friend Jenna from New York City. These two women are some of the forever friends I made on my first travel adventure to Costa Rica in 2005 to do volunteer work. I arrived at the airport, again unprepared in case of emergency and waited outside as taxi cab drivers, and people from hotels kept wanting to take me somewhere, or sell me something.

Finally I saw Amanda and Jenna, we took a cab to Antigua, since it was a weekend and Amanda happens to have weekends off. This little town was BEAUTIFUL, cobble stoned roads, and lots of beautiful buildings. We left our stuff in our tiny hotel room, where Amanda and other peace corps members stay on weekends if they leave their sites. Since Amanda had business to take care of the next morning, Jenna and signed up to hike a Volcano -Volcano Pacaya- if it's active when you get to the top sometimes the guides let you roast marshmallows off of the lava.

After we were all set to go, we went to Sky Bar, a bar on the roof of a hotel. It was so beautiful, and it over looked the city. We chatted and basked in all our English speaking glory, able to use slang and communicate in a way that Amanda and I being in Latin American Countries hadn't been able to in a while, ironically we also figured that it was cheaper for Jenna to spend the weekend in Guatemala than if she had stayed in New York City. We had 'michelada's which is beer with clamato juice, the girls didn't like it much, but I was happy as a clam.. no pun intended.

The next day we hiked the volcano, the views were breathtaking. The hardest part was at the end, where you wakled on what looked like tiny rocks -but was actually dried up lava, it slipped like quick sand, and got into your shoes, but the trek was worth it. That is the closest I have ever been to lava.

We met up with Amanda and took a shuttle to Lake Atitlan. We were exhausted and didn't have much time to do much, but put our stuff down in a hotel and make our way to a Thai food place. I was disappointed by the food, but in retrospect some other food we tried after this made this seem like a good meal. The next morning we made our way to the docks to head out to San Marcos Village.

One of the cutest little Islands I went to. There was one main dirt road following the dock, that led you to other little roads to find restaurants, coffee shops, book stores, yoga places etc. We stayed in a total relaxing, beautiful hippy-ish hide away. It was very zen. My bed was in a wooden loft above our room. Being with anyone from my El Yue Group (the organic farm I worked in) is always so inspiring, we only see each other at most once a year... but when we get together we have long discussions of sex, family, marriage, the world... and I am always so inspired.

At this point I was pretty sure I didn't like Guatemalan food, but breakfasts at this little resort were so calm and magical. We sat underneath trees, near their open kitchen, restaurant made out of beautiful wood, and had oatmeal with fruit, on a bright yellow table, completely surrounded by nature.

On our boat ride back we saw a couple carrying their young children, and we all said at the same time "that's gonna be us one day" traveling the world with small children and all...

This stemmed into a funny conversation of how our children will go to their second grade class and children will say "this summer I saw Mickey and Minnie at Disneyland" and you? "my family and I built an irrigation system in Colombia...." :::silence:::

We headed back to stay at Amanda's peace corps site, a tuk tuk, to a bus, to another bus, to the back of a pick up truck through dusty rocky roads. The town she lives in called : Estancia de la Virgen Aldean en la Municipad de San martin Jelotepeque.

This is us at the top of the valley that is her town.

Being in her site was a big life changing experience. This town doesn't have an internet connection, and very few people have cars. Come Monday morning we took the long trek- walking- to one of the 'telesecundaria's' that Amanda teaches in.

Jenna and I spent time answering questions the students had about our lives, they were so interested in our travels. Most of these childrens have never been outside their own towns, let alone outside of the Country.

Most women and girls dress in traditional clothing, the colors are so beautiful.

This was a back of a truck we took back into town after a grocery trip.

One of the more vivid dreams I had while traveling was here. I dreamt I was making ceramics again. Most times I've had dreams about ceramics, they've been my happiest dreams, during my saddest times- or mostly during difficult breakups. Although I wasn't exactly going through a breakup, I was traveling for an undetermined amount of time and working on letting go...it was in this little town that I wrote out the names of people, and things I needed to separate from my life. I ripped up the piece of paper and left it in this foreign Country, hoping to never return to them.

Jenna had to get back to work in NYC, so she left us, and Amanda and I hung out. We cooked together, or mostly she cooked and I watched. We watched movies on her computer... and we read... a lot... I mean a lot. I think I read 5 books in a week. One of my favorite books I read while there was Paul Coelho's The Witch of Portobello.

I got used to the morning routine of walking 30-45 minutes to different middle schools, as children and adults all around town said hello to their blonde friend Amanda... washing our clothes with a bucket of water on a washboard, hearing roosters in the morning, and being thankful.

So it was at this time last year on March 4th of 2009 that I was walking through dirt roads in Guatemala with my dear and amazing friend Amanda....

"Start doing what you want to do, and everything else will be revealed to you."

-The Witch of Portobello

Mango in 10 for 2010 February

2010-03-01T07:30:00.000-08:00

New Things

1. Do things all out. Focus on details and effort this year. No more going through the motions.

I'll have you know that while I could have opted to not buy paprika for the garnish on deviled eggs, I quickly thought how that would be a half ass thing to do, and bought the $5 dollar spice- knowing this might be the only thing I ever use it for. How's that for going all out?

2. Cook 2 new recipes a month
Since I failed this one last month. I had to cook 4 recipes this month to catch up. I was successful!

3. Do 365 challenges in "This Book Will Change Your Life"

check out my progress... my most proud challenge of this month is the practical joke one.

4. Become a Tourist in SoCal

Had Ethiopian food, went to pretend city, Hamburger Mary's Drag Queen Brunch Show, Went to Biker Bar Cooks Corner on a motorcycle....just to name a few, not too shabby.
5. Try to do something: history, science, math, literature, art, music, philosophy and religion every month.

history:

science:

math: So a friend of mine, Marko, has a financial blog. Try as I may a lot of financial terms are above me, so for this month I told myself to read his blog as much as possible and try my hardest to take in all of his financial information. Buy gold, and California is starting to come out of a recession, even though the rest of the US will not be following...

literature: Persuasion by Jane Austen

Art:

Music: Nicole introduced me to Thriving Ivory. "Show me what it looks like, outside your window at twilight."

Philosophy: My friend Joe shared with me what an ontological argument is. Straight from wikipedia :examines the concept of God, and states that if we can conceive of the greatest possible being, then it must exist. The argument is often criticized as committing a bare assertion fallacy, as it offers no supportive premise other than qualities inherent to the unproven statement. This is also called a circular argument, because the premise relies on the conclusion, which in turn relies on the premise.

Religion: I went to Rock Harbor Church for a financial class, and learned about Dave Ramsey, I am now starting Financial Peace University next week. Hmmm

On Going

6. Write every day. Definitely didn't write every day, but I wrote as much as I could, I took my notebook to work and would write on my lunch break, and I usually wrote before bed. I have been reading my old notebooks, and am so glad I have those memories in books :)

7. Workout 3-4 a week. Hard. (here and there, have to be better about this in March, just signed a 6 month contract with Next Level Fitness to be a bootcamp spokes-person. Going to try to make it at least 3 days a week, and I got a yoga video from the library to do at home)

8. Read 12 Books. One per month.
I read Persuasion by Jane Austen.
9. Try new things. Every day. (most have been written about, Ethiopian is a big one)

10. Pray/Mediate. As much as possible (successful)

#76. Try Ethiopian Food

2010-02-26T09:17:00.000-08:00

From my 101 things to do in 1001 days.... Not only did I add this to my list after seeing it in Brooke's, but I got to try it thanks to her planning and seeking out the best Ethiopian food in Orange County.

I did some research, so I could go into it knowing what to order. We got to this place in Anaheim that according to yelp reviews is the best Ethiopian food in the area, unless you drive to LA. It was quiet and calm... between four of us we got zil zil tibs, which her pieces of beef in a honey sauce. We also ordered the vegetarian platter, which had about 10 different little mixtures (similar to Indian food) and you made your way around the huge platter. They give you this bread that is spongy- called injera, almost pancake like- but salty, and you use that to eat your food - no forks!

I was in heaven, everything had a new taste I had never experience, and it was delicious. Once you ate all of the injera served on the side, you could eat the injera that all of the food was laid on- it was really neat.

We all shared a bit of Tej wine, which is a honey wine, super sweet- and ordered the coffee. That was probably my favorite part, they do it all from scratch, so they come out and roast beans infront of you- leaving a delicious coffee smell. After about 10 minutes they bring out 3 little epresso cups with really strong black coffee.

Great meal!

Traveling Via Post Crossing!

2010-02-25T08:30:00.000-08:00

A couple of my friends told me about this website called Post Crossing. It's basically a site, where you sign up to send and recieve real post cards from people all over the world. You write an ID # on each post card you send, and when it is recieved, the person registers it. When it is registered your address and info is given to someone, then they send you a post card!

Being sick I've had some time to watch a couple of movies, Paris Je T'Aime, Bright Star and Angels and Demons - all had me missing my days in Europe. I was so nostalgic watchin Paris I love you, and seeing all the places I visited this summer in France, that I wanted to jump into the tv and go dancing with Parisian boys!

My friend is getting married in Cancun in May, and I just reserved my flight... I can't stop day dreaming of white sandy beaches, crystal clear water and a group of some of my best friends celebrating their wedding.

Until then... my main focus is to get a permanent job, so I can pay off my debt, be financially fit and keep meeting my personal life goals. The things getting me there are: committing to bootcamp at Next level fitness, hello bikini season, Financial Peace University - starting next week- hello intensive 18 week Financial course, and my long list of read this, cook that, write about this 2010...

Anyways- back to the purpose of this post...while remembering that traveling is a state of mind I sent out my first 5 post cards through PostCrossing... to Germany, Czech Republic, Taiwan, Poland and Minnesota. I am so excited for those 5 ladies to recieve them (yes all ladies, more guys should sign up on this site!! ;) and can't wait to travel through the post cards I will recieve!

Jane Austen Book Club - Emma

2010-02-24T09:45:00.000-08:00

The first book for our Jane Austen Book Club was Emma. My excitement for the book club has been short lived, after the first meeting has been postponed a few times, so rather than wait around I am continuing without everyone. I think it's safe to say most people didn't finish Emma...let alone start on any of the other books. Womp womp womp. I read the entire book from start to finish, and actually really enjoyed it.

Emma is a spoiled rich 'handsome' girl. I crack up everytime the word handsome is used to describe characters of this time. She intends to never marry, and take care of her widowed father. She is happy in all matters of her life, and thinks she has a gift for matchmaking. In the end some of her matchmaking plans take unexpected turns, and next thing you know everyone is in love with the wrong person - and she falls for her brother in law.

Although Emma kind of did get on my nerves for being so spoiled, as the book progressed I realized how strong she was. I think it's a direct reflection on Jane Austen, and the type of woman she was during a time when women weren't really seen or allowed to be strong. I loved how witty Emma was , and by the end of the novel found myself completely entwined in all her love drama. The person that never grew on me was her friend Harriet- who the book refers to as sweet. I think she has no back bone, and is just overly obnoxious.

My favorite quote, by far, was something Emma tells Mr. Knigthley

I always deserve the best treatment because I never put up with any other. -Emma Woodhouse

When I was almost done reading, my roommate made a connection between Emma and Clueless. So naturally when I was done with the book, I re-watched Clueless and saw it so plainly! Elton, is Mr. Elton. Cher is Emma- duh. And the obnoxious character Britney Murphy plays is just as obnoxious in a 1990's teen movie as in a 1800's novel!

I'll finish this entry with a tid bit of information I hoped to share at our meeting. I got this book called "The Jane Austen Handbook. A Sensible, Yet Elegant Guide to Her World" This is a direct excerpt from it:

Women's Underwear

Ladies generally did not wear drawers in Jane Austen's day. After all, what would a well-bred lady be doing that required more coverage for her private parts than a close-fitting floor lenght gown provided? Drawers did not come into wide use until crinolines became fashionable in the 1850's, when a gust of wind could blow a lady's skirt up over her head. Some of the very fast and fashionable set did wear various kinds of drawers in the Regency, but they were considered a bit risque.That means we may indeed assume, with a high degree of probabilty, that Jane Austen went commando.

#8. Get a Smart Phone

2010-02-19T10:00:00.000-08:00

Another thing from 101 Things to do in 1001 Days. The original list said smart phone, then it changed to iphone... However after looking into the difference in prices I would be paying to switch service, I reconsidered.

I found the new white blackberry (a racially confused phone) under my carrier- and hello smart phone- with a 20 dollar payment plan you say? Yes please! No more using my free/$30 dollar phone that feels like it's breaking every time you text! You helped me out in my desperate time of need - and for that I am grateful - but it's time to move on.

I love my new phone already - it has so many new features my last blackberry couldn't even dream of (such as but not limited to: video, radio station streaming, LOUD speakers, it is light as a feather, actually smaller than the iphone (and with longer batter life), and it has all the cool applications and linkage (is that a word?!) that smart phones have to offer the world- Hi pandora radio , oh hello Kindle for blackberry, welcome back into my life BBM and nice to meet you twitter genius.

A new friend for BC2, welcome to my life WB!